Slights Of The Roundtable

Out of Town by Jimmie Bernardin - Peaches and Hot Sauce

mattpayton — Mon, 20 May 2013 18:38:05 -0500

Out of Town by Jimmie Bernardin - Peaches and Hot Sauce:

Jimmie got out a pen and started to write. It turned out funny. Either because of the words or because of the ink spilled all over his crotch. You can decide.

Episode 108: Marks We Hate In this episode we discuss and make...

mattpayton — Wed, 15 May 2013 12:27:00 -0500

Episode 108: Marks We Hate

In this episode we discuss and make jokes about the following: tattoos, being critical/cynical, gay marriage, Obama administration scandals, suicide and execution methods, Jon Voight and conspiracy theories. So call up your relatives and gather them ‘round the podcast broadcasting machine.

Episode 107: With Support from David Geffen Grab your multigrain...

mattpayton — Wed, 08 May 2013 11:52:00 -0500

Episode 107: With Support from David Geffen

Grab your multigrain chips because this week we’re joined by a very special instructor in the Chicago improv scene. If you’ve ever been part of a mixed race couple be sure and get your secret stomach surgery after riding a bike. Then turn on the show, order some Burger King delivery and write your World War II letters. The member of the trinity that will find this the most appalling has to be God, right?

Episode 106: To Be Hans Blix We have a new episode, bitch! So...

mattpayton — Wed, 01 May 2013 13:23:00 -0500

Episode 106: To Be Hans Blix

We have a new episode, bitch! So stop being a cunt and join our poker night already. We may question your plastic surgery choice but you’ll be very supported when you come out of the closet, especially if you’re not a rich athlete or entertainer. Also, I don’t know if you saw this in the Yahoo! top stories but some cologne is good but Axe Body Spray never is. Now someone call up Eugene and play this damn thing!

jimmiebernardin: Long time stage illusionist and street...

jimmiebernardin — Wed, 24 Apr 2013 10:19:42 -0500

jimmiebernardin:

Long time stage illusionist and street magician Steve TaDa is now offering personal appearances! For a nominal fee, you can have Steve at your party! Watch the video for details, and call today!

Episode 105: We Go For The Hive Jimmie is back this week...

mattpayton — Wed, 24 Apr 2013 09:02:00 -0500

Episode 105: We Go For The Hive

Jimmie is back this week although we’re still without Michael so you will be deprived of jokes about unnecessary scientific studies. What you won’t be deprived of is promoting each other, discussion about Tetris and the mysteries of unused and very used vaginas. Be gentle while listening.

Improvisation Course Catalog, by Matt Payton - Splitsider Matt...

mattpayton — Mon, 22 Apr 2013 13:23:48 -0500

Improvisation Course Catalog, by Matt Payton - Splitsider

Matt wrote this thing about improv for a humor website. Now the Slights have conquered the HuffPo, Splitsider and cancer. If only they could conquer a goddamned punchline every now and again…

Episode 104: Channeling Art Corr Jimmie and Michael...

mattpayton — Wed, 17 Apr 2013 14:05:00 -0500

Episode 104: Channeling Art Corr

Jimmie and Michael are indisposed this week so Matt recorded a little something to tide you over. It turned out really…um…there is some good music played during the bumpers at least!

As discussed on the most recent episode, Tim Gunn is Kip...

mattpayton — Mon, 15 Apr 2013 15:55:00 -0500

As discussed on the most recent episode, Tim Gunn is Kip Dynamite after breaking down and allowing some caffeine in his system:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rx5Nqod5wqM

reblogged from mattpayton: Write Off! - Second City If you’re a...

mattpayton — Thu, 11 Apr 2013 13:27:13 -0500

reblogged from mattpayton:

Write Off! - Second City

If you’re a Chicago person that needs something to do this Friday night, come to Donny’s Skybox and see a sketch I wrote performed by two very funny ladies. From what I understand, you may want to purchase your tickets early.

Episode 103: First Goes The Guy From IT This week we try...

mattpayton — Wed, 10 Apr 2013 14:07:00 -0500

Episode 103: First Goes The Guy From IT

This week we try something a little out of the ordinary in the form of good jokes and interesting banter. You might want to call LL Cool J on the phone and listen to it with him. And what the hell - get Tim Gunn in on it with you so the conversation won’t veer into sex too much. Let’s go!

Episode 102: Shin Choo Soo Are we mean to you? If so, let us...

mattpayton — Thu, 04 Apr 2013 17:36:00 -0500

Episode 102: Shin Choo Soo

Are we mean to you? If so, let us know and we’ll talk shit about ourselves on our podcast. You’ve never heard this many punchline showdowns in one show before and if you know that to be true from listening to all the past episodes, you need a much more constructive hobby, like taxidermy or masturbation. Listen to this episode while talking to a friend on the bus.

Blue liquid beaker turned upside down: sterile but innovative.

mattpayton — Mon, 01 Apr 2013 10:03:40 -0500

Blue liquid beaker turned upside down: sterile but innovative.

Episode 101: Still Not Done Warning: listening to this episode...

mattpayton — Wed, 27 Mar 2013 15:08:00 -0500

Episode 101: Still Not Done

Warning: listening to this episode might damage your fake boob. We suggest you move carefully while squatting at Second City and making sexist jokes about the new Secret Service director. If you get your blue period before menopause, call Kirk Cameron and he will prescribe you some Swedish pornography. In the meantime, go see the new Oz movie with a gay football player.

Episode 100: “No More!” They Thundered In case you...

mattpayton — Wed, 20 Mar 2013 12:55:00 -0500

Episode 100: “No More!” They Thundered

In case you can’t tell from the episode title, this is our 100th show. This week we do what everyone does on their anniversary and talk about ourselves in a way that’s attempting to analyze but just ends up being self-aggrandizing. Listen to us fail as always while also hearing some really good jokes actually. At least we haven’t gone downhill as much as the History Channel.

ScriptedFestival - iO West Theater Come check out Matt &...

mattpayton — Tue, 19 Mar 2013 13:14:31 -0500

ScriptedFestival - iO West Theater

Come check out Matt & Michael at 10:30PM this Friday in the DCT at iO West to see the “best of” version of their Edinburgh Fringe Fest show. Then come see them the next day at In-N-Out Burger trying to justify traveling across the country for another 30 minutes of pleasure.

Episode 99: She’s a He and That’s Fine This...

mattpayton — Wed, 13 Mar 2013 12:04:00 -0500

Episode 99: She’s a He and That’s Fine

This week’s episode is only about half as ill advised as Jay-Z making music with Linkin Park and twice as pleasurable as teasing a man’s nipples. This is one of our most informative shows as we will explain how a woman-to-man surgery works, why purchasing water in bottled form is foolish, where the pain from a kidney stone first appears and the brilliant plot of Kangaroo Jack. We’re not on gluten during the show so we feel really good!

Episode 98: Does Not Equate Did Twignut tell you to listen to...

mattpayton — Wed, 06 Mar 2013 15:18:00 -0600

Episode 98: Does Not Equate

Did Twignut tell you to listen to this week’s show? Because that guy has some crazy theories, some of which you might want to take with a grain of salt. He knows more about the weather than your dad, though. But don’t ask him for a piggyback ride.

reblogged from mattpayton: Physical comedy this delightful only...

mattpayton — Wed, 27 Feb 2013 09:21:51 -0600

reblogged from mattpayton:

Physical comedy this delightful only happens once in a blue moon. Let us celebrate it by laughing in a high pitched giggle that is as euphoric as…well just about anything really.

Episode 97: Man, We Just Gellin’ This week’s show...

mattpayton — Tue, 26 Feb 2013 13:39:00 -0600

Episode 97: Man, We Just Gellin’

This week’s show features the first ever Slights of the Roundtable prayer. And we all know that prayer has more power when it’s done by a pack of gays with their purple shirts on. No audible high pitched squeals or drinks of water were taken during it. Now dial in and listen up, jackass.